Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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