So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
