Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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