there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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