3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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