I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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