when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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