Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize