On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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