Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
