I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
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