Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
