Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize