She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
