Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
