Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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