I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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