Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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