PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
50% drunk capacity currently
It's rum buckets o'clock
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
