i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize