I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
My ass is underappreciated
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
