I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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