i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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