I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
