So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
