I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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