his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
