Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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