I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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