I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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