it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
