I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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