You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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