We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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