Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
