New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
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