What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
