im about as happy as oj after his trial
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize