also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
