We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
