Jerry, you need to find god
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
