put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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