Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
