i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
