Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
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