is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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