Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize