You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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