try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
