Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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