also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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